The Emperor’s New Polls


The crooked media…the crooked media is at it again! They’re so low—despicable. Just lie, lie, lie.

It is hard to swallow.

Hard to swallow? Now they keep saying she won the debate. Can you believe that? She won the debate? Please.

It’s a mystery. It really is.

They talk about polls in her favor. Polls—what about the polls in my favor?

As usual, CNN seems to be pushing its own poll.

Exactly! What about the Internet polls? I’m way up there. Look at this one—one hundred percent Trump!

Didn’t you just make that one?

Of course. And now it’s on the Internet. When’s CNN showing that one?

Aren’t you the only one who voted in the poll?

And? Are you saying my votes don’t mean anything?

No, no—not at all.

Because I nailed it. How could you have a better poll than a poll of me? I’ve got the best mind for this of anyone I know—anyone at all.

I’ll get this on Twitter.

Right now! Hillary won the debate? Please. Next they’ll be telling us Obama’s not a Kenyan.

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