Keeping It Fluid


Mr. Trump, can we circle back to ISIS.

Sure, sure—big threat. The biggest. Most peril we’ve ever been in as a country. Believe me.

So how are you going to tackle ISIS? How are you going to defeat them?

Oh—we’re going to destroy ISIS. And we’re going to do it fast—very fast. You know Obama created ISIS, right?

Sure, sure—but how exactly are you going to defeat them?

Oh—I can’t tell you. Gotta keep these things secret.

I see.

You can’t let ISIS know what’s coming.

Of course. Let’s switch to North Korea, then. What can you tell us about your plans for dealing with Kim Jong Un?

Oh—I’ve got a great plan—the greatest. He’s going to respect us and fear us because we’re going to be strong. Believe me.

Can you give some specifics?

Come on, and show my hand? You know better than to ask that.

Is there anything you can be specific about?

Well, I’m going to get a sandwich after this interview. But—

You can’t tell us where.

Exactly. Don’t want crowds and big lines. Very busy—lots of things to do.

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