Handling It


Great news!

What happened?

You know my soldier?


He just got a promotion!

Congratulations! That dude’s worth every nickel you paid.

Thanks, I know. As soon as he sends me the…uh…little rank pin thing—whatever you call it. I can put it on my uniform.

Nice. Your guy is tremendous. How did I get a guy who is so useless?

Yeah…sorry about that. Maybe he’ll turn things around.

Hardly. He can’t even figure out how to get wounded. I can’t even get a freaking purple heart.

Yeah—that’s definitely rough.

Next thing you know he’ll starting whining about PTSD.

Next Satire